a heap of broken images

Just went to Kinokuniya today to pick up a copy of Ulysses! I feel excited at the prospect of slogging through the 600-odd page nightmare. Interestingly, I was talking to Cheng at the Lit (J) section - we couldn't find a second copy of Ulysses which cost less than 30 bucks - and we wanted to change the terms of our massive Ulysses-reading suicide pact to something like a Portrait of the artist as a young man-reading suicide pact and then Cheng said
- No, but Ulysses is the challenge
and some random woman said, NO, Finnegans Wake is the challenge

which came out of the blue but was roughly consistent with what I'd been told. Hmm.

School is a miserable slog. Everyone comes, everyone goes, nothing happens, it's awful. But I know i'll have to start studying at some point which is a TERRIBLE prospect but inevitable I guess.

I just read Abby's blog and it got me Thinking. I complain a lot about school but if it ever came to the crunch I doubt i'd give it up. I mean, I could probably do without studying. Or homework. Or insidious references to invisible poultry. But School... maybe not. I think it's become too much a part of me that when I'm finally cut loose I think i'll take a few months if not a whole year just adjusting to the shock of not having to wake up in the morning and grope about for my uniform or having to wander about the house half-naked in the unholy hours of the morning griping about yesterday's frisbee game in which I sprained my knee. That's a scary thought.
It's scary that despite my unspoken promise to myself that I would never let school become my life, I've gotten emotionally involved in it (and it's a terrible thing to be emotionally involved with the enemy). There are some baggages i'll be leaving in the corridors of RJ, and Raffles Institution.

I didn't ask for it. I've tried for years to make school inconsequential because I can't deal with responsibility, so that I could do it with my eyes closed. There's still things which, against my better judgement, I like about school. And i hate that.

adam